A Yogic Perspective on Your Relationship with Food
Societal messages vs being kind to yourself
Have you ever thought about the relationship you have with food? Yes, food is required for survival, but eating can have so many positive and negative attributes, based on the fat-shaming culture we live in, and our thoughts about food.
If you’ve ever used food to numb your feelings, you may have a strained or disordered relationship with food. I have. Food is one of many things that I’ve used over the years to numb my big feelings. I wrote about that here, here, and here.
Yoga is something you practice both on the mat and in your life. Principles such as Ahimsa/Non-Harming, Santosha/Contentment, and Karuna/Compassion are part of yogic philosophy and tradition to help us lead more mindful and open-hearted lives. Applying these principles to your relationship with food can help you heal from disordered eating habits and improve how you feel about yourself over all.
Society tells us that “fat” is bad and unhealthy
While there can be some truth to this, it is definitely not the whole picture. Someone is not unhealthy simply because they carry more weight. Someone is unhealthy because they eat poorly, don’t exercise correctly, don’t sleep enough, and don’t manage their stress well. Your outward appearance has nothing to do with that. There are many factors when it comes to health, how much fat you carry on your body might be a symptom rather a cause. It also might be completely fine.
Fat does not automatically equal unhealthy, just like thin doesn’t automatically equal healthy. When you focus on health instead of weight, your body will find its proper size. Letting go of the “fat is bad” mentality can free you from shame so that you can instead focus on health. It’s easier to eat for health at least 80% of the time when you are not steeped in shame.
Food as fuel
There are many reasons why we eat, as well as different types of hunger. If you are eating to stop yourself from being physically hungry, you will make different choices than if you view food as fuel. Looking at food as energy for your body, you will make healthy choices most of the time.
That doesn’t mean that you can’t eat food for pleasure. Birthdays happen, holidays happen, and with them come delicious food. View these events as rare and just one day. Enjoy the rich, delicious foods, then go back to eating for health the rest of the time. Eating perfectly 100% of the time relies on willpower, which is a limited commodity. Eating well 80+% of the time helps you let go of the all-or-nothing approach and creates space for special days.
Applying yoga to eating
Living your yoga practice means taking yoga off the mat and into your life. When it comes to eating, there are many principles that you can apply to give you a better relationship with food and yourself.
Mindfulness/Sati
Sati is translated as “memory” or “to remember to observe,” which we often use for Mindfulness. Mindfulness means paying attention to what is happening right now, focusing on this moment and letting go of all other moments.
When you eat mindfully, it means you are present and paying attention to what you put into your mouth, as well as the full experience of eating. You smell, taste, and feel your food, enjoying the entire experience. When you numb with food, usually you miss enjoying the food because you are working to stuff your feelings down. When you eat mindfully, you are fully aware of your experience.
Imagine having a piece of homemade apple pie in front of you (or something that you deem delicious). Take a moment to see the pie, with all of its colors and textures. Smell the aroma of the apples and cinnamon wafting up to your nose. Slide your fork in and feel the way the fork melts into the apples and crust. Taste the flavors in your mouth and feel the textures on your tongue. Breathe and be with the experience.
This is where you find pleasure and joy in eating. Seeing, smelling, tasting, feeling. You get to use your senses to take it all in. This slows you down and keeps you in the moment so that you don’t miss the enjoyment of your pie. It also keeps you from overeating because you can feel when you’ve had enough.
Compassion/Karuna
Compassion is powerful practice that can create real change in the world, both externally and internally. Compassion means “to suffer together,” where you can know another’s pain and hold space for that pain. We can direct this outward toward other people, but we can also direct it inward toward yourself.
In Kristin Neff’s book Self Compassion she talks about the 3 aspects of self-compassion: Self-Kindness, Mindfulness, and Common Humanity. You can show yourself compassion by being kind to yourself, being aware of your words and actions, and knowing that you are not alone in how you feel.
Applying compassion to how you relate to food can be life changing. Sometimes you eat without thinking, making choices that don’t benefit your body or your health. These choices might leave you feeling bloated and uncomfortable, but can also leave you feeling ashamed. It’s this shame that causes you to eat more, even when you are not hungry, because who wants to feel that?
An alternative is to have compassion for yourself. Did you eat food that you now regret? Yes. Do you have to feel ashamed about it? No. You can notice your behavior and choose to pause (mindfulness). You can be kind to yourself, knowing that feelings are hard sometimes (self-kindness). You can acknowledge that you are not the only one who does this and that you don’t need to feel ashamed (common humanity). You can feel held by your own heart and mind with loving thoughts and attention.
Non-Harming/Ahimsa
Ahimsa means non-harming in thoughts and actions. It involves how you talk to yourself and how you behave in the world. It’s amazing how much harm we can cause ourselves, simply with our thoughts and beliefs. No one is meaner to us than we are, or more critical or judgmental. Cut that out, be nice! You deserve a kind voice inside your head.
When it comes to eating, I recommend letting go of the idea that there are “good” foods and “bad” foods, and instead focus on what might be good or bad for you specifically. Are there certain healthy foods that cause you harm? Maybe you have a gluten sensitivity and every time you eat bread you feel bloated and lethargic. Perhaps every time you eat cheese your sinuses get congested and you have headaches. Are bread and cheese bad foods? No, but they might not be good for your body if they cause symptoms.
Focus on foods that give you energy and feel good in your body, and eat them at least 80% of the time. These foods don’t cause harm, they help. When you eat food that might cause temporary harm (phlegm, bloating, lethargy) enjoy the food while you eat it, and let go of shaming yourself. The shame will cause more harm to you than the actual food. You are allowed to derive pleasure from your food, you just want to use intention and mindfulness when you do.
Intentional Eating
Coming this March! Intentional Eating: Finding Peace and Balance in Your Relationship with Food is a 6 week online program to help you cultivate a healthier relationship with food and yourself. Using principles of yoga and brain science, this program will give you tools to regain power over yourself to make the best decisions for you. If you feed your feelings with food, this program is for you. Click the button below for more information or to sign up! Only 3 spots left!
Living Yoga: One Yoga Teacher’s Journey to Surrender is a book about the first 2 limbs of yoga, Yama and Niyama. Yoga is more than poses on the mat. Yoga is a science of how to live in the world with more peace and ease. Through self-inquiry, non-harming, gratitude, and other yogic principles, we learn to let go of our stories and feel more whole within ourselves.
Janine Agoglia is a GenX yoga instructor who has been practicing yoga since 1995. Yoga has helped her let go of perfectionism, anxiety, and depression, and navigate the challenges of life. Through honest reflections, humor, and owning her humanity, Janine shares her bumpy and unskillful journey to finding peace and surrender. Her explanations of these ideas are meant to help you live your yoga practice more fully and completely, and find peace and balance in your day to day life.
